Alrighty, check it, yo! An hour or so and some newly aquired photoshop skillz later and we have a stylized background that irritatingly sticks to your screen, mwuhahahaha!
Still looking into the option of putting it on both sides and scripting it thusly to accommodate any resolution. Though I might also just find that too much work.
Now lets shave that week old beard of mine.
Oh yeah, and in my search for material for the BG I found this lil video:
yes, the LHC does give me a hadron.